Sunday, June 23, 2013

5 steps to determine whether or not a story is worth reading.

Okay, as you can all tell from the title, this post is here for those who are either new to the fanfic scene, or are tired to digging through the sludge to find the gems hidden among the garbage. Basically, this is a 5 step process that will help you guys figure out whether or not a story is worth reading within the first chapter, possibly even before that.

Please note, this process can be changed or steps can be added to this process periodically. If any of you have your own steps to add, do not hesitate to inform me.

5 steps to determine a good or bad fanfiction:

1. The summary for the fanfic is terribly written, with poor English, shoddy grammar and no thesis for the main plot other than 'OH MY GOD! HIS POWER LEVEL IS OVER 9,000!'. When the summary is written like this: "The life of naruto i very painful so he quite his life and start with new his life will new thing" you know the rest of the story is probably written just as poorly.

2. The first paragraph of the story is so horribly written that cavemen can write better English.

3. The first few paragraphs of chapter 1 give you all the information you need to know about the entire plot, and even some information you don't need to know. I call it the Uzumaki effect, where upon you learn that Naruto is the son of Kushina and Minato and that the Kyuubi is sealed inside of him and he's the child of destiny and Jiraiya's godson and Nagato's fifth cousin once removed on his mother's side. Also, Kyuubi was tricked into attacking the village by that masked man (Tobi, Madara, Tobidara, Obito, Tobito, whatever you want to call him) and is not really evil but actually a hot vixen who fell in love with Naruto the moment she was sealed into him and has every intention of giving him superman-like powers without the kryptonite. Oh, but he doesn't actually know any of this. I'm just telling you because I want you to be bored while reading the rest of my story.

4. Naruto is chased by a mob of hundreds of villagers (and no one seems to notice despite the fact that someone like, I don't know, the ANBU patrolling the village, the Hokage with his skrying orb, the children hearing screams of "KILL THE DEMON!" from the many houses Naruto and the mob run passed would probably hear them) and gets beaten to within an inch of his life before being rescued by the ANBU, or the Hokage, or token hero #32. Please note, this example can be used for any fanfic. I just used Naruto as an example because it's what I know best.

5. The writing changes from third to first person periodically throughout the story. This happens mainly when the author decides to type phrases like 'I mean' when none of the character are speaking: "I mean, it's not like Naruto was used to seeing a giant phallus sticking out of the ground everyday".